E- Poetry Writers -- Richard

It's funny how the things we see
Affect us all, including you and me.
The world around there for us to behold
Though so much splendour is as yet untold.
Yet, above and apart, there is also mankind's art
In the form of pictures, paintings, photographs.

And as the changes of the world they come about,
The current place to be is on the internet,
Where I beheld a wondrous, beauteous sight!
A lovely smile, a gorgeous face,
And a bikini'd bod to break my heart.
But then I think, 'Though looks are great,
Surely one should rather go for personality?'
Perhaps one should, but beauty has its virtues too,
But the most important is a heart that's true.
And so I click and make a friend
Who it seems is keen to meet me too.
Not surprising, I think, as my picture flattering,
I had chosen – which surely is not cheating.

Special perfume, bath, and in the new clothes that I'm sporting
I'm off to meet the object of my latter-day courting.
And when I arrive at the pub just opposite the station,
The designated place for my assignation,
I look around with such a sense of anticipation
But then just simply walk on by,
Than me she's twenty years older if she's a day,
And surely she will break any scale on which she did weigh.
In this digital age I simply had forgot
What one can do with Photoshop.

A Picture Which Made A Big Impression
(Part the second - also a joke)

That glorious picture of the lake,
From my view, of please don't take!
Colour, contrast, waters twirl,
Winds do eddy and leaves do swirl.
Never in my life of nine-and-twenty
Did I observe a picture of such beauty.
I'd come home every night and gaze
Upon its splendour and amaze
Myself with how after a beer or two
I'd see how each hue
Had added to its effect and texture too.

Till then one glorious and convivial day
Of imbibing at the Coach and Dray
I came back and then perchance
I sat under the picture and did glance
Upon the the mirror on the op'site wall
And all past happiness did pall.
Everything was in reverse!
And all constituent parts they did converse
With my dull brain
And they did say
'It's much the same as 'twas before
Yet this time even more!'
You see it like it was of yore
But this time it has even more
Because the reflection has a collection
Of even more wonderful and interesting insights into what's enlightening
Brought about, no doubt, in part by my imbibing
Thus deep in thought sat I
And yet deeper meanings did my eye enjoy.
But in the sober world one knows not
To bump the wall
Because the picture it did fall
And with a smack not unlike that of a rifle butt
It made a deep impression on my nut!

A Picture Which Made A Big Impression
(Part the third - the serious bit)

One day while channel hopping
I came across the usual shopping
Channels, but in another spot
I chanced upon an advertising slot
About which no doubt many people did complain
'Cos I know I have never seen it again,
But, Oh my God, I have remembered!

A little boy, searching a rubbish tip
In some foreign land
Found some food which was clearly rank
And calmly began to eat
– to my disgust and consternation -
As up came their strap-line;
'The trouble with today's kids
Is that they eat too much junk food.'

Of course it was supposed to be a pun
Bad taste (!) if you will
But who can be such a one
To ignore the message contained therein.
To those of us who have so much
We have a duty to try to help
That poor lad in some foreign land.
We need to give generously
So others can be shown a helping hand.